Prove Yourself

Fight Club. Once you watch, you cannot help but be changed but it's destructive beauty and powerful poison. It made me think, if I were to die today what would my legacy be? Probably a coveted frog painting I know some of you are lusting after :) But more than material things, I hope I would leave with you a love of life. The love I have can be described as zesty, potent, dynamic, flowing, optimistic and passionate.

In the movie, Edward Norton beats up a kid named Angel Face and explains his actions by saying, "I felt like destroying something beautiful." I think we sabotage our own lives by thinking we are not worthy of happiness- we destroy something which is good. Or maybe we take a more logical approach or too much of an emotional approach when it comes to managing our lives. Yes, I believe Tyler in the movie when he says, "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything." We need to accept on some real, deep and meaning level that we are going to die- in fact we are dying everyday. It's up to us to make the most of our time by maximizing our happiness now- not by waiting around for it to happen to us. We create our own happiness.

Sometimes we rely on the experiences of others to determine how we will live our lives or even make some important choices and that I believe is what stunts our growth. It's like looking through a kaleidoscope and never being able to touch the pieces for yourself- I would much rather tediously build my stained glass window out of those tiny bits for years with my fingers bloody from the continued work and know that that work was mine. There are no rules to love- we make our own within the boundaries God has set.

Don't analyze the past and consider if it was wrong or if it was right. We knew it was right, we did it and it worked at the time. Just because it doesn't work now doesn't mean it won't work in the future. Don't second guess, stop becoming numb to love, let go and move on. We cannot be what once was, we can only become something greater.

Amy xoxo

"What You Know"
by Two Door Cinema Club

In a few weeks I will get time
To realise it's right before my eyes
And I can take it if it's what I want to do

I am leaving, this is starting to feel like
It's right before my eyes
And I can taste it, it's my sweet beginning

And I can tell just what you want
You don't want to be alone
You don't want to be alone

And I can't say it's what you know
But you've known it the whole time,
Yeah, you've known it the whole time

Maybe next year I'll have no time
To think about the questions to address
Am I the one to try to stop the fire?

I wouldn't test you, I'm not the best you could have attained
Why try anything?
I will get there, just remember I know

And I can tell just what you want
You don't want to be alone
You don't want to be alone

And I can't say it's what you know
But you've known it the whole time
Yeah, you've known it the whole time

And I can tell just what you want
You don't want to be alone
You don't want to be alone

And I can't say it's what you know
But you've known it the whole time
Yeah, you've known it the whole time

And I can tell just what you want
You don't want to be alone
You don't want to be alone

And I can't say it's what you know
But you've known it the whole time
Yeah, you've known it the whole time

Ps What are you fighting for? Better yet, what are you living for?